Sunday, November 2, 2008

A Love Letter




October posed a problem for me. My friend Shari left for Manchester, England, like I did one
year ago. As her date of departure approached in September I recalled how I felt as the time came for me to leave the country. Upon looking back, I saw that one thing I really cared about was staying in contact with those I had left here The States.

Naturally, there was the internet to help me both update people on my life and stay updated on things going on here at home. But I didn’t want that to be my sole method of communication. E-mail, an already cold and detached means of correspondence would only be made more so by the distance. So I decided to write letters to those I was separated from.

Now with Shari gone, I longed to do the same. The only problem is finding the time. Writing a blog is one thing, but piecing together a carefully worded extended thought is completely…oh wait… it’s the same. But still, the formation is different, the way it all comes together. It’s difficult to explain but as a writer I see a distinction.

So, as usual, I have been going to class, working at the library, ushering at our auditorium, spending time with friends and doing all the other things a young college student does in his spare time. But I was plagued by the fact that though I’ve been doing all of those things, I wasn’t able to work in writing a thoughtful letter to my dear Shari!

Now I get pretty busy, but as my father says, “All those great men in history had the same amount of time in a day as you do; twenty four hours- no more, no less.” And these guys weren’t sitting around on youtube all day. They were forging governments and invading countries.

Needing inspiration from “the greats,” where else could I turn but to Love Letters of Great Men, the compilation of epistles (letters) by some of history’s most notable figures. And these are some greats, might I say. Voltaire, Beethoven, Van Gogh. These men who produced books, music and paintings also found time to produce “I am a prisoner here in the name of the King; they can take my life, but not the love that I feel for you.”(Voltaire). And “Oh God, look out into the beauties of nature and comfort your heart with that which must be.” (Beethoven).

Leafing through the letters of these famous men, one thing linked them together, aside from their elevated status in our historical memory, and in their own time. It was their passion that spurred production. It was the love they felt for their loves that allowed these well-springs to open amidst wars and turmoil and bridge the expanse that often separated them.

My hope is that this post will do just that. Narrow the gulf between us…convey my love to her, who now is so far away, though at times feels as though she is at my side. I miss the walks around the museum, the span of time sitting, looking at a painting, drinking it in, then looking at each other and knowing that the other knows what you’ve tasted. I miss the pain in my gut and the tears in my eyes, both from the laughter shared with her. I miss where she is now. I know that her adventures there will be different than my own yet very much the same, as we are very much the same.

Autumn is here. The leaves have begun to change. The days get colder and we see less of the sun, obscured by the clouds of a new winter. But still, there are days like today when, though only temporarily, all is bright and beautiful. Despite the clouds of tragedy that surround, it causes me to hope, and look forward to when my sun will return to me.

For Shari, a sister more than blood can say.


Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Monae- A True Work of Art


I was reading this months Vogue when, amidst the ubiquitous Prada adds and Ralph Lauren spreads, I came upon the "People are Talking About..." section. This month features a short article about a new artist who has recently carved out a niche in my heart: Janelle Monae

Anyone who knows me is aware that I love music. LOVE! And my taste in it has been described as classic, strange, exotic, funny, eclectic and unique. So it's no surprise that all these words can, and have been used to describe Monae. Her music is an intriguing blend of sounds from all over the audio-verse. There is funk, rock, rap, electronica and exceptional vocal talent on display in her work, and sometimes its all in one song!

Discovered by Big Boy of OutKast at Justin's, the restaurant owned by P. Diddy, Monae has caught the ear of many in the music industry. Called everything from "enchanting" by Andre 3000, to simply "fire" by Missy Elliot. Monae is leaving a lasting impression on her peers.
With a style all her own -hair pulled up the sides, coiffed on top, Plaid blazers, silk trimmed jackets, tuxedo shirts, high wasted trousers and various bow ties!- this young lady is a walking fashion statement, with an ear toward the future and a voice from the past (check out her heartfelt rendition of the classic, Smile).

In a time like this, when so many songs come equipped with instructions on how to dance to them (Bend your knees, rock your hips, shake that booty meat?) it's rewarding to see Monae let loose on the stage in a completely non-choreographed ecstasy.


I'm captivated by her energy and her voice, but I love a live performance. And to see her in motion is to witness a force of nature. She moves away from the mic, kicking, clapping, and spinning around like a whirling Dervish. Then, swinging one arm in front of her and one arm behind she marches to the beat of her own drummer. Im not sure where she's going...but Im right behind her.

Monday, July 28, 2008

The Man Bag: What if Your Pappa Got A Brand New One?

There has been lots of chatter about Mens Fashion. Mainly because it has begun to once again blur the line it maintains with womens fashion.

First it was skinny jeans. The snug fitting bottoms once worn only by old school Rockers came back on the scene a couple of years ago, though really only on the Womens side. The few guys who were wearing them were from the "EMO" sect, and were purchasing across the isle...or just borrowing a pair of their sisters.

THEN: Like a mighty river, the 80's rushed back into our lives and suddenly everything was tight and colorful again. Now it wasnt just the "EMO" guys crying out for a tighter fit, it was all guys. From Skater Boys to B-Boys; they, much like a certain commercial from the time, declared "I Want My Skinny Jeans!" And the industry responded.

Now they can be seen in most every shop and boutique, and on almost every size and frame. Reminding all of a safer time...when what was in a guys pants moved around less than Denzel in The Bone Collector.

NOW: The big issue? The Man Bag. The topic has been toted around more than any of the actual bags have. And the reason- typical apprehension to new things. A particular problem for men whenever something comes along that challenges outdated views of masculinity.

Ive heard the arguments and read the blogs. The best they can come up with is that the bags look like purses and therefore, make the men who carry them look like women.

Really?

When women wear pants do they look like men? No. Because aside from the fact that the styles are different, they embody them in a completely different way. There is nothing inherently feminine about a non-bifurcated piece of cloth that is worn around the pelvis and buttocks (what we commonly call a skirt). Because with the right pattern, that same fashion is called a Kilt in Scotland, and its anything but feminine!

*Believe me on this one. Ive clubbed in Scotland before*

The wearers of the Kilt don't carry themselves as women, so they aren't confused with women. Are men in the US afraid that if they carry bags they'll be mistaken for the fairer sex? Surely they're smarter than...oh who am I kidding? Guys cant even stop screaming "No Homo!" (trying to reassert their imagined manhood) long enough to realize that if they feel like they have to do it, they're not really men.

Real men know who they are and don't give a damn if you don't! And style works the same way. Style is very personal, unique to an individual. You have to be able to know that you look good in what you're wearing. Fashion will continue to blur the lines between men and women, because both groups are distinct enough to extract their own feel. Fashion is for everyone, but style is all your own.

FUTURE: Men wont be patting themselves down while doing the "Keys, cellphone, wallet" check, but will instead be going through their man bags.



Sunday, July 20, 2008

The Summer So Far



I cant believe it was March since the last time I wrote one these. Actually, on second thought...I can believe it. So much has gone on I just havent taken the time to write it all down. And though recently I've had plenty of time to write, I've just now gotten some inspiration.


Its the middle of the summer and there are only a few days left in July, so for me, my time in Charlotte is winding up. I'll be moving into my new apartment in Greensboro in a few weeks and saying "See you later." to the city. But Charlotte has become more than just a city to me. It embodies my new life, new job, new career goals and new friends.

Before I even arrived in town I was on the lookout for jobs. My second oldest sister, Kamille, who I would be living with during the summer helped by gathering applications and asking people she knew about positions. I was busy scouring the internet for something that would enhance my career aspirations of being a writer. Thankfully I found a listing for CharlotteStyleMag on Craigslist.com.

The listing described the mag as representing everything fabulous and fashionable in the Queen City. An online publication that was offering experience based internships. In other words, a great way to learn and get in on the ground floor of a budding fashion magazine. No pay but...BABY STEPS! So far- the magazine has been a great method for putting my name out there, getting to know people and, above all, honing my craft.

Much of this summer has been spent making new friends and spending time with the ones I already have. My buddies Jay and Marcus have been great sources of entertainment and escape. When I need to get away (even though Im already away) I know I can go to Jays place. And nine times out of ten, Marcus will be there. Whether it's an all night Scare-a-thon (Nightmare on Elm Street's a must!) or a Sex and the City Day (Jay=Miranda, Marcus...Samantha!) they're my go to guys.
Of course I have one of my favorite ladies in the U.S. here with me in Charlotte; Shari Tate. An indispensable font of inspiration, love, humor, and great places to go in the city(restaurants, museums, galleries, etc). She has made my sisters job of showing me around much easier.

And I would be remiss if I didn't mention the special visits made throughout June by my big, little brother Dustin. Big because he's bigger than me, little because he's younger-though not by much. We actually celebrated his 21st on the 6th. Fun times.

I got a job at Express at the end of last month. Ive worked a total of one day so far. It sucks but, I would rather have something than nothing. Well...to tell the truth, I would rather be working a job than just being employed but... aaanyway....

All in all, Charlotte has helped me have a great summer. Especially now that one of my NAACP colleagues has reminded me that she lives here and now Ive incorporated her into my circle. Lovely!

There's just one thing that takes away from everything else; the fact that I have to leave. Its not something thats particularly difficult for me, or at least it wasnt. Not until I started dating. But thats a post for another time.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Here's to You


I have just returned from an enlightening and inspirational meeting with a very dear friend of mine, one who I consider a sister. It was'nt something we planned, but within moments of sitting across from her I was sure that it was ordered.

There are a fair few people who I am sure I can speak the truth to. Not that I lie to people (not on purpose at least) but I dont let everyone know what is on the inside. With her it's easy because she already sees inside me, so there's not much point in trying to hide what's there.

We had such a conversation. I wont write about the details of it, but it was moving. She shared a bit of her writing with me, and being deeply flattered I shared mine with her. We shared our thoughts about ourselves and each other. There was alot of learning, and alot of laughing. A beautiful exchange of ideas and love. It's really hard to describe in words how she makes me feel inside, but there's comfort in knowing I wont ever need to describe the feeling to her.

She tells me that she's ready to start being smart and stop being impressive. I would say she's halfway there. Some people leave you wanting to change the world...she leaves me wanting to change myself.
Here's to you Tash

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Volley Follies

Im sore. Want to guess why? I'll just go ahead and say before your mind wanders too much. One word. Tennis.

Its Spring Break here at UNC-G and my friends and I are trying to make the most of being on campus. For the past two days I have been playing tennis with them. First it was my friend Kiya on Tuesday, then we added two more, Shari and Herb, last night. It was fun (and funny) enough Tuesday, but Wednesday night is when it got interesting.

Now I like to play the game, but that doesnt mean Im a pro. And the same goes for my friends. Im sure the sight of just Kiya and I alone could inspire a lifetime of laughter. But when the four of us got out there at once, it was really something to behold. The running, the jumping, the full on leaps and twirls. It looked more like a gymnastics competition than a doubles match at times. I started off with Kiya but later we switched and it was girls against guys.

It was pure comedy. All the mock competitiveness. We got more fake insults over the net than tennis balls. We intended to keep score at one point, but that idea went right out at 15-Love. If the way my body feels is any indication of how long we played, we must have been out there since last week. But Im not complaining. We didnt keep score but if laughes are points, then both teams won!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

To Capture a King


Part I.
He tells me he likes Chess…
I’m more intrigued now than before,
I’ve only known him for a few hours but I’d like to know him more.
We met easily enough, like eyes across a room.
We learned one another, and laughed with ease at our new knowledge.
Throughout the night we flittered around each other,
Bugs around a streetlight.
Sharing stories and barbs, we learned one another.
He learned I was interested, but in no way was I pressed.
I learned he was the same, and plus, that he liked chess.

Part II.
“So you like playing games?”
“No. Devising Strategies.”
“To get as many pieces as possible?”
“No. To win.”
“You mean… to get the king?”
“Yes.”
“So are you looking for a king?”
“…Yes”
Yes!

Part III.
From across a board they have been placed, each spying his counterpart.
Pieces move around them, caught up in the game.
The two sit, peering across the expanse, crowns atop their heads.
Some mistake them for queens, but they know their truth.
They know they are kings. Limited but sought after. The prized pieces.
Everyone wants them, but they want each other.
There is distance between them, but they come close together for a short time.
They meet, but like eyes meeting across a room, it is only for a moment.
The connection is brief but lasting.
Now they move away, back to their respective kingdoms,
Perhaps they plan how to capture the other,
And after that…where to set up their castle.

Heart 1 to Heart 2: Checkmate

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Spring Break So Far



*3/8/08

I’m here in the Jackson Evers International Airport in Jackson, Mississippi with my fellow NAACP members (all 2 of them) waiting for our advisor to come and pick us up with the rental car. We flew out of North Carolina at 6 am and got here in MS at 8. Because he had a different flight, we were faced with the decision to either wait for him or to pay for a taxi to take us to our hotel. Now entering into the fourth hour of waiting for him to arrive with the car, we are beginning to feel the gravity of our cheapness.

We’ve already eaten. We had breakfast all around. We were looking over the entire menu but when we were told that they were only serving breakfast here at the On Stage Bar and Grill, that quickly narrowed our selections. The food was great. Or it could possibly be that we had all been up since about 3:30 without anything to eat. We were starving, and a nice leather boot might have done the job, as long as it were topped with shoelaces.

And we’ve slept. Right here in the restaurant we closed our eyes and curled up…or stretched out (whichever worked for the respective person). I caught some sleep on the first flight out, before our layover in Atlanta. It’s sad really. I don’t even remember takeoff. One moment we were on the runway going through all the boring preparations (that’s probably what put me out) and the next, we were up in the air and my mouth was wide open. The sleep was refreshing, but still I needed more. I slept again on the next flight here, this time nudged awake by one of the other members. Apparently my head was about to sail into his ribcage. Thankfully, he saved me the embarrassment of coming to in his lap.

Now, waking from a longer, more fulfilling sleep in between a booth and a table, I feel energized and ready to get out and do something…like go sleep in a bed.

*The date this actually happened.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

The Great Weight Debate


Two of my friends are currently trying to lose weight. One of them is on a regimen, has cut meat out of her diet, eats loads of fruit and bread, and exercises regularly. The other just doesnt eat. Ok...he eats maybe once a day and goes to the gym, but Ive walked around campus on an empty stomach before and I know what torture that can be. So I cant imagine how it must feel after working out. Surely suffering through headaches and fatigue in order to lose some inches from his waist. Naturaly, I expressed my concern but he insists that he's done it before and it will work again.

Of course he will lose weight, but there are better ways. Like the route that the other is taking. It takes more work but I think thats the positive aspect of it. I know it feels rewarding to start something and stick to it, work through it until reaching your goal. I havent experienced that with losing weight, but in other areas of my life. I just wouldnt want to attain something so passively. Sure the gym is providing exercise but that's not going to make anyone any smaller, that's just going to turn the fat into muscle. Which brings up an interesting item that two of my other friends were discussing.

One mentioned how he read that a large percentage of Black women were overweight. The other countered that we have to ask "What is considered overweight?" She pointed out that the organization who did the study did not take into account athleticism. Which means there are women who are considered overweight becasue they are not the ideal weight for their height, but who are actually quite healthy because they are not fat but muscular. Women who engage in sports like boxing or rugby fall into this category.

Its important to put information in perspective when we hear the results of these studies that bounce around on tv or in magazine articles. If a study shows that 70% of Black women are overweight but leaves out that 25% of those women are athletic and actually relatively healthy, it skews the truth to an extreme. The problem of Black women being overweight is still there, but 45% doesnt sound as compelling if you're trying to sell something, or scare someone. So they leave out some facts and put some things in small print. Nobody reads that.

What people are reading are things that give them the desire to be less heavy rather than more healthy. Some people take up more space than others, and thats not a bad thing as long as both groups have the same amount of space in their arteries.

Blog-napped

Thanks to my friend and co-worker, Randi, I have created a blog. Up until last year I didnt even know what a blog really was, but since then Ive been slowly creeping into the world of online expression. I probably should have done one of these earlier but since I was keeping a journal, I felt this would be secondary, and therefore no-good. But now that Im only keeping a journal for private things, I can give my time to this (all 2 seconds I have after school, work, org's and my social life-not to mention sleeping and eating).

Anyhow, here it is...my blog. And I really think the people who run the "internet[s]" should think of a new word for this wonderful invention. Blog sounds like something that has appeared on my face the day of the prom, or a big presentation, and is going to force me to focus on it more than dancing or speaking clearly. Or perhaps minute, mystical men of myth, who steal children from their homes...or so your parents say. "Be sure to behave. You know the Blogs take children who are naughty."

You know, I didnt believe in Blogs at one time, but I guess I just had to get taken...